Things Cameroon Has Taught me:

1. Do things that make you happy.

            You are in charge of your own happiness. Life is short and it’s silly to waste it wondering what will happen next, worrying over nothing, or being stressed out. Don’t waste time on things you don’t like. Don’t let inconsequential things upset you. Don’t drag yourself down. Keep a positive attitude and make your own happiness. Appreciate what you have. Take awe in the little beauties in the world. Find what fulfills you, and do it. Embrace and carry out whatever it is that fulfills you. Simply, do things that make you happy.

2. That luxuries are just that—luxuries, not necessities.

We get caught up with so many things that we think we need, but in reality we can get by on very little. We become so dependent on material things that while helpful, are not truly necessary, and suddenly we don’t know how to function without them. Electricity, running water, your own car, dishwashers, phones, internet. All great things, but in reality, they are so easy to live without. In fact, many of these so-called luxuries actually become stressors in our lives, and sometimes, believe it or not, life can be a whole lot simpler when they go away.

3. Discovering what is truly important in life.

             It’s not how many things you own or the newest gadget, it’s not the square footage of your house or the size of your salary. It’s the connections you make, the people you interact with, and what you do. You don’t need things to be happy. It’s something you hear a lot, but something I had never truly seen in action before. People here actually focus on what is important in life instead of running around trying to make money. And guess what? They’re happier than any other people I’ve known. People here value family, relaxing with friends, and simply enjoying life.  They live in the moment and cherish what they have. They have a lot less to be thankful for, in some ways, than their American counterparts, but they are happier (whether in spite of or because of, I’m still not sure). They understand what matters in life. At the end of the day, the things that are important are not things, but people. Your family, your friends, and taking the time to enjoy them.

4. How to stay positive and make the most of a situation. Adaptability and patience.

            So you just walked for an hour to have a meeting and no one is there. So you have to sit around for the whole morning because the bus is delayed. So it takes an entire day to send one email. So what? What does that really matter? Instead of worrying so much about what comes next, enjoy what is happening now. Time is not what is so important, but what you do with your time. Enjoy it. You can stress that your bus is an hour late or you can pass the time sitting with strangers and have a good time. Patience. Life is short. Appreciate it. Prosper in it.

5. How to be comfortable in your own skin. You are who you are.

            I have always been confident in who I am, but I have never before been so blunt about showing it to others or felt so accepted. I cannot hide here. I am a small white girl and everyone knows it. There is no point in trying to conceal anything or trying to alter myself. I don’t wear makeup, I don’t wear fancy clothes, I don’t try to modify my behavior or my opinions. I don’t try to fit in, because I know I never can. And yet, I am so incredibly accepted here. People see past flaws, past appearances. People love me for who I am, truly. Don’t be afraid to show who you are. Be you.

6.     How to say no and how to assert yourself.

     Saying no can be hard. It can also be very important. I have become very good at saying no— whether it’s to the stranger on the bus who wants my number, the village who wants me to give them a bulldozer, or the chief who wants me to take him to America. I have learned how to assert myself and even further, how to voice my own needs. I know when to challenge someone else’s idea, how to stick up for my own beliefs and opinions, and how to ask for help when I need it.

7. How to laugh it off. Don’t let it get to you.

Sometimes you need to fight and defend yourself, other times it’s better to just let it go. Sometimes, it’s not worth it. You have the choice to let it get to you. You can get frustrated and angry, or you can chose to be positive. When your car breaks down in the middle of nowhere because the driver didn’t put in enough gas, when someone yells “whiteman” at you, or when the grown man mocks your accent, you can decide that it doesn’t really matter. Everything is easier when you’re happier. Learn to laugh at yourself and the situation. If you choose to take things lightly and not get worked up and go about with a positive attitude, things work out easier and better for you.      

                 

8. How to love. We are together. Take care of one another.

            People here are more connected to one another. Their connections are deeper, purer, and reach wider. They love everyone. They recognize that we are all humans, and that as such, we are together. We are one, and we must take care of one another accordingly. They welcome people into their communities openly, they feed anyone who comes to their door, they share money, they lend a helping hand, and they support each other. They don’t think individualistically, they think about everyone together. Their hospitality does not end at their own community. They love everyone and know how to truly care about one another. I have been welcomed with open arms and have been loved and supported by an entire community. It is indescribable and unlike anything I have experienced before. Truly an entire town loves me. People I barely know have risked their lives for me, have fed me, have looked out for me, have sheltered me, have taught me, have shared what little they have with me. I have learned a lot about what it means to love and what it means to take care of others, and that that love should be extended to everyone.

9. How to be someone worth caring about.

            In receiving so much care and support, I have also learned how to be someone worth caring about. To be grateful, to care about others in return. To take the time to create those relationships. To be friendly and interested, to think past one’s own self. To help, to listen. To be kind. It’s a two way street; in order for someone to care about you, you have to care about them. I have learned how to deserve their love.

10. How to be strong. Almost nothing can get to me.

            I have lived a lifetime in two years. I have encountered and experienced and dealt with things I never knew existed until now. I have pushed myself to the limit of my abilities, grown and adapted, learned, and thrived. I can face challenges in stride. I have been through a court case, I have seen the deaths of close friends, I have been exposed to pain and suffering, I have dealt with the hardships of life, I have challenged tradition and customs, I have faced sexism, I have worked with impossible people on impossible projects, I have learned, in short, how to be tough. I have discovered that I can get through it. I am more capable than I ever imagined. Bring it on.

11. Don’t wait.

            Take advantage of every opportunity you get. You never know what will happen next, so make the most of the moment. Whether it’s charging your batteries, filling your water filter, or visiting your friend, don’t wait. Do things when you have the chance—you never know if you will have the opportunity later.